Noobs say the funniest things

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Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Avalanche on Mon Jan 04, 2010 3:47 am

We've all been there. Multiplayer, and a newb or noob (there IS a diffrence) comes up with a weird question, or starts randomly whining about things. share you're experience.

For me, I guess it was with a mate of mine playing Halo on xboxlive.....Kid starts bragging in the lobby and pretty much gets dominated when the game actually starts. Then sends us a message saying he was letting his brother play and wanted a rematch. Along with some prepubecent swearwords..... Needless to say he went down.

probably also myself in brawl with items on, saying that luck is a skill too Razz

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  TheTJ on Mon Jan 04, 2010 4:01 am

I suppose basically every "You cheated" comments.

I have no Idea HOW to cheat. In most situations it's impossible (IE: Multiplayer on one TV)

I once asked a kid why he thought I cheated and he said, with dead seriousness, "You cheated because you did better than me."

Needless to say, I loled.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Sanosukesama on Mon Jan 04, 2010 6:43 am

So I'm playing Phantasy Star Universe with a friend of mine, & we're in 360 party chat along with some people he's met in PSU. We're just talking and the conversation moves along to Halo: ODST. Jokingly, I go 'Yeah, you know that new Halo: Operation DesertStorm coming out later this year' & one of the guys (read: kids) goes 'Sanosuke, you DO know what ODST means, right?' .........I was stunned. Really? Seriously? No jokes allowed over 360 party chat, did I miss the memo? Man I <3 kids Razz He goes 'Ok, just checking' Rawr. Cool

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Bugman on Mon Jan 04, 2010 7:23 am

Free Weekends on Team Fortress 2 are priceless because of the noobs.

Back stab a noob, see his reaction (even better if it's the first time he's back stabbed). In fact, do anything as a Spy to a noob.
Deploy an ubercharge when surrounded by noobs.
Read their comments while they play. (Why can't I back stab when cloaked!? I put some grenades on the floor but they won't explode!)
Taunt Kill a noob.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Zhiel on Mon Jan 04, 2010 7:49 am

BY2K wrote:Free Weekends on Team Fortress 2 are priceless because of the noobs.
Noobs? More like Newbies.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Avalanche on Mon Jan 04, 2010 7:51 am

yeah those seem like newbs stead of noobs.

Newbs are the new/inexperienced players who may actually have some hope left.
Noobs are the trash talking 12 yo idiots mic-spamming swearwords.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Bugman on Mon Jan 04, 2010 8:40 am

Oh right...

Still it's funny.

Did you ever saw a noob killing a Spy by singing?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhyxqmbhb6E

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Avalanche on Mon Jan 04, 2010 9:32 am

yep, thats the kind of noob were talking about :p

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Innotech on Mon Jan 04, 2010 10:02 am

Thankfully Ive never been exposed to any of this. the last online game I ever played was Need For Speed 5 in 2000.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  .. on Mon Jan 04, 2010 10:08 am

Im not surprised... smack talkers in Halo? Shocked

I don't talk smack. I play the game and have fun. However I can have really good runs in DoD:S.
---

Noobs are noobs... ya know? Talk smack, get owned. Rage quit, mic spam, swear at you for winning. The usual.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  DarkFalco on Mon Jan 11, 2010 4:25 pm

my main problem was when i played runescape i would always have newbs following me asking me to take them places, wanting to trade their crap for money, and begging for coins. i told them to go earn them like i did Razz

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  .. on Mon Jan 11, 2010 4:35 pm

Ah Runescape... haha.

I remember that too. More than likely a scam. I remember I made my living off of coal mining. Someone would pay me like 125-200 per coal. I would rack up about 200-400 coal and give it to him. Which really adds up to a LOT of gold.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  DarkFalco on Mon Jan 11, 2010 5:08 pm

Outlaw wrote:Ah Runescape... haha.

I remember that too. More than likely a scam. I remember I made my living off of coal mining. Someone would pay me like 125-200 per coal. I would rack up about 200-400 coal and give it to him. Which really adds up to a LOT of gold.

yeah i'd do something like that or when i was a member i would make flax. that payed well too. so did killing a ton of monsters and taking the loot Very Happy

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  MENTOK the MINDTAKER on Mon Jan 11, 2010 7:13 pm

I have to say the most memorable times in a multiplayer match are namely when I'm playing Halo on live.

One lone arrogant bastard will bark commands to his team, curse a storm when his orders aren't followed then go on a rampage of shooting his teamates in vengence for not obeying him. The humanity!

Then there's the "I'm great, your crap" kinda noob. When things are working well for the team, it's "all because of me" but when things start going to shite it's "GAAAH! MY TEAM F!@#ING SUCKS! YOUR ALL NOOBS!"

I love these kind of gamers XD

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  .. on Mon Jan 11, 2010 7:32 pm

MENTOK the MINDTAKER wrote:I have to say the most memorable times in a multiplayer match are namely when I'm playing Halo on live.

I spy with my little eye, the word that makes everything make sense. Cool

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Serras-Kai on Tue Jan 12, 2010 11:53 am

I go to brawl tournaments every once in a while.
I don't brag about my skill in Brawl, I merely state facts- I'm not invincible, I'm not the greatest, but 2nd place five times is still my only statement on skill.

So anyway this kid (he couldn't have been older than nine) is bragging that he is the Pit mastah, and not even major league champions can defeat him. He swears up and down that he's got all these awards back at home (this was at a con) and he could whup up on anyone who he thinks seems worthy (he had yet to play.) Now, I hate braggers. I really hate braggers. So I asked him to show me the ropes. I told him I'd gotten 2nd place in a few tourneys (only three at the time) and that I wanted to see how the "big boys" played. It took some prodding before he would do it (and even then a bet had to be placed) before he would play me, and the game room guys (who were tired of this kid's shit) were nice enough to allow us a 1v1 match, as apposed to the free-for-alls that had been taking place before. I chose Olimar and immediately started hearing this kid's shit- "Olimar sucks, he's a low tier character," etc. Even the crowd started betting against me, favoring the kid's Pit.

4 life, no items, Final Destination.

The match lasted three minutes.

He was stunned that I'd beaten him (as was everyone else, although he was probably moreso) but unfortunately the guys were assholes and I only got the $20 the kid had bet against me. Either way, he left the game room and wasn't back (so far as I know) and if he was, at the very least he didn't talk the shit he did before.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  TheTJ on Tue Jan 12, 2010 12:01 pm

Serras-Kai wrote:I go to brawl tournaments every once in a while.
I don't brag about my skill in Brawl, I merely state facts- I'm not invincible, I'm not the greatest, but 2nd place five times is still my only statement on skill.

So anyway this kid (he couldn't have been older than nine) is bragging that he is the Pit mastah, and not even major league champions can defeat him. He swears up and down that he's got all these awards back at home (this was at a con) and he could whup up on anyone who he thinks seems worthy (he had yet to play.) Now, I hate braggers. I really hate braggers. So I asked him to show me the ropes. I told him I'd gotten 2nd place in a few tourneys (only three at the time) and that I wanted to see how the "big boys" played. It took some prodding before he would do it (and even then a bet had to be placed) before he would play me, and the game room guys (who were tired of this kid's shit) were nice enough to allow us a 1v1 match, as apposed to the free-for-alls that had been taking place before. I chose Olimar and immediately started hearing this kid's shit- "Olimar sucks, he's a low tier character," etc. Even the crowd started betting against me, favoring the kid's Pit.

4 life, no items, Final Destination.

The match lasted three minutes.

He was stunned that I'd beaten him (as was everyone else, although he was probably moreso) but unfortunately the guys were assholes and I only got the $20 the kid had bet against me. Either way, he left the game room and wasn't back (so far as I know) and if he was, at the very least he didn't talk the shit he did before.

Ahhh... I love a good comeuppance story...

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  JonnyJinx on Tue Jan 12, 2010 12:01 pm

Awesome story. =P

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Bugman on Tue Jan 12, 2010 12:22 pm

Freaking tier, freaking fox only, freaking no item, freaking final destination!
That. is. all.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Smashy B on Tue Jan 12, 2010 1:48 pm

Serras-Kai wrote:I really hate braggers.
This sevenfold. Also, Olimar is actually ranked higher up on the tier list.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  .. on Tue Jan 12, 2010 2:46 pm

Back in my old 007 Nightfire (PC) days. There was this guy, I didn't really like him, but he always wanted to pick a fight with me. He was talking shit and all. Well we played ctf_parkinggarage. I beat the guy easily. Then later he gets a friend in, the friend changes his name to match mine then they play and take a picture acting as though I lost.

Doesn't matter, I won, beat the hell out of him.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  DarkFalco on Tue Jan 12, 2010 4:10 pm

smashbro wrote:
Serras-Kai wrote:I really hate braggers.
This sevenfold. Also, Olimar is actually ranked higher up on the tier list.

which shows EVEN MORE how much of a noob he was

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  Blue Madness on Tue Jan 12, 2010 4:29 pm

Serras... that story made my day brighter.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  TD260 on Tue Jan 12, 2010 6:11 pm

Serras-Kai wrote:I go to brawl tournaments every once in a while.
So anyway this kid (he couldn't have been older than nine) is bragging that he is the Pit mastah,
In a world of noobs, only two characters inspire new levels of being a douche, because they think they can play.
1: Pit mainers, like that little asshat.
2: Ike mainers.
Now, I know semi-pro players that use Ike as a secondary, just to screw around with.
I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about the little arrogant snotty kid, who just got the game, played as Ike, and think they can take on the world.

Also, I don't have the skills yet, but I REALLY want to get good, play as MK, LOSE, then pick my main, Link, and thoroughly kill everyone.
(As I Said, I Need the skills. At best, I would be able to knock a stock off of a good player, but most likely get 3-stocked. still. I can dream.)

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

Post  SnakeInABox on Tue Jan 12, 2010 6:15 pm

Yea, I suck. My Main is Snake, but I do way better with Kirby and Mario. I guess that makes him not my main, but for the sake of fuck, I shall say he is regardless. Also, I pwn with Ike. Why? Because anyone with opposable thumbs and half a brain could pwn with ike.

It's the law.

...

Fuck sonic.

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Re: Noobs say the funniest things

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