Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 2:04 pm

This year's award for the most anemic SAVE THE WORLD STOP WARS LOVE BABY SEALS song is going to be hard to decide. Armenia and Russia are both going after it with a vengeance.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 2:13 pm

"no air, no pride
that's why birds don't fly"

You have literally no idea ever how birds work you dumb shit.

... HOLY SHIT DUBSTEP DRACULA IS ON STAGE.
Take us to the underworld, Dark Lord! Drop the bass and feast on virgin souls!

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 2:19 pm

Hey, Bonnie Tyler's song isn't half bad.

Wait. It's Sweden now. Do your worst, nemesis in blue and yellow. I. FUCKING. DARE YOOOOOOUUUU.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 2:28 pm

This is your worst, you piece of flaccid shit? A pretty boy in white and a bunch of ballerinas? What's the matter, Abba couldn't make it?
Come at me! Take aim and fire at me with all your meatballs and Ikea chairs! Ha! HA HAHAHAH HAA HA HAHAHHHAH
FUUUUUUCK YOUUUUU

...
...

Umm, sorry. I admit that was a bit inappropriate and I promise it won't very likely happen immediately again.
Hey look it's the Hungarian hipster boy.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 2:33 pm

Oh, the viking tenor of Iceland. You're a bit too good for this contest, really. Shine bright, you crazy diamond.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Perry on Sat May 18, 2013 2:35 pm

Im watching it as I just sit behind my laptop, and honestly, I'm barely keeping the songs apart.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 2:42 pm

I don't think Glass Box Guy has any idea what he's gotten into.

How do they feed him? Isn't the box a bit difficult in everyday life? Does he have a love life? How does he go to the bathroom?
Actually never mind.

Greece's guys are at least having fun. These lyrics are literally just saying "free booze" again and again.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 3:11 pm

Europop, screaming lady, screaming lady, europop, ballad, europop, ballad, screaming lady, screaming lady.

This is like an endless cycle of self-devouring meaninglessness. An ouroboros of mediocrity. I don't think I can even remember more than six songs. It's just all become a gray blur of dark matter.

I'm properly rooting for Dubstep Dracula here. Consume them, my Lord!
That or Greece with their drunken cavemanly charm.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 3:16 pm

SUDDENLY

NINJAS

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Perry on Sat May 18, 2013 3:29 pm

I'm just sitting here in agony with all the "funny bits".

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 3:44 pm

Okay, the bullshit is over and the points start flying.

For every 12 points to Finland I will destroy something beautiful.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 18, 2013 4:52 pm

Meh.

This contest peaked at the time of rapper astronauts.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Doctor Shulk on Sun May 19, 2013 8:15 am

I respectfully disagree: it peaked at dubstep Dracula.

He still is the winner in my heart.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Raya on Sun May 19, 2013 2:05 pm

The downstairs is trashed, the bin is overflowing and I have enough leftover cake to give the entire forum diabetes. It was a good party.

I thought the contest was brilliant, definately much better than last year. The songs were much higher quality and all in all it was a really good show. One part I particularly liked was all the contestants at the start walking across the bridge behind their flags onto the stage. I thought that was a really nice touch, I hope they keep something similar in the future. Other highlights included:

- The opening of the caterpillar travelling across Europe and turning into a butterfly to get across the strait.
- Someone in the front row waving the Australian flag.
- Someone in the audience waving a Korean flag.
- Spanish guys with the HOLA MAMI flag from the semi-final being in the final.
- Lena fucking up the votes, what the hell girl.
- Yohio being a total weeaboo when giving the votes.
- The Finland vote woman saying that Finland is 'the land of ding-dongs', teehee.
- That Sweden song in the interval was...special.

Denmark had a really good song, I'm glad they won. Azerbajan were totally cheating again, looking at where they were getting their points from. UK didn't do too bad, thankfully. But Eric Saade really needs to just stop talking. I liked his entry, but holy shit every time he talks he just needs punching.

So, anyone up for a trip to Copenhagen next year?

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Spoiler:

FUCK YOU RAYA.

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

AND

FUUUUUUCKKKKK YOOOOOUUUUU

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Raya on Tue Sep 24, 2013 12:19 pm

Eurovision announces rule changes

Since that whole drama kicked off earlier this year regarding vote buying, the jury rules are being changed so that the names of jurors will be revealed ahead of the contest to make voting more transparent.

Also the investigation over whether or not Azerbaijan cheated is still going on, and I'm willing to bet it comes up they did. Azerbaijan are dodgy as fuck in Eurovision and I'm pretty convinced there's been a lot of corruption on their part.

And, uh, Turkey have dropped out of the contest to run...Turkvision. Sounds...thrilling.

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"We'll be going about our business one day and then someone will be like "hm, where's Barda" and Raya will all suspiciously be like "WELL DON'T LOOK AT ME"..." - Rocket Admin Camilla
King Avalanche:
Spoiler:

FUCK YOU RAYA.

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

AND

FUUUUUUCKKKKK YOOOOOUUUUU

the one time I trust you with my back and you plant a dagger in it.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Raya on Mon Jan 13, 2014 2:05 pm

That time of the year is fast approaching! The venue’s been named, participants confirmed and several acts already named. Portugal and Poland are back and Greece got a new public broadcaster. The Eurovision machine is on the move.
 
The second batch of tickets come on sale on the 31st, so I was wondering, is anybody interested in going? It’s been mentioned before in the past, and since Cophenhagen is a short direct flight for most of us it seems feasible. Last year’s contest was a cracker too, so I’m sure the Danes will put on a good show.
 
Ticket prices are between 42-212€ depending on where you sit, but the venue seating plans aren’t very helpful. If people did go we’d need to book at the same time to ensure we sat together. I’ll logic a guess that we’d go for either B or C, maybe D if there’s some decent seats.
 
If anyone’s interested let me know.
 
Also Sah, one thing that might be of interest to you- the organisers are asking for volunteers to look after the delegates during the contest. You need to be able to speak Danish or Swedish, and also English + another European language. Which rules me out by a long shot, but it’s something you’d be eligible for.

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"We'll be going about our business one day and then someone will be like "hm, where's Barda" and Raya will all suspiciously be like "WELL DON'T LOOK AT ME"..." - Rocket Admin Camilla
King Avalanche:
Spoiler:

FUCK YOU RAYA.

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

AND

FUUUUUUCKKKKK YOOOOOUUUUU

the one time I trust you with my back and you plant a dagger in it.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Raya on Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:18 pm

Australia to take part in Eurovision 2014

I'll admit, when I first saw that headline I braced myself for the impending shitstorm. But as it turns out it's just poor reporting- Australia isn't competing, it's providing the interval act. I think it's going to be fantastic. Usually the interval act is the host country celebrating their national identity, but since Australia isn't the host, I expect it's going to be a celebration of Eurovision. And since Aus loves Eurovision and it's the first time they've ever got to take part in the contest, I think they're going to pull out all the stops and make something really memorable.

Looking forward to it!

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"Foxes never lose their tricks, do they?" - Quaetman
"We'll be going about our business one day and then someone will be like "hm, where's Barda" and Raya will all suspiciously be like "WELL DON'T LOOK AT ME"..." - Rocket Admin Camilla
King Avalanche:
Spoiler:

FUCK YOU RAYA.

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

AND

FUUUUUUCKKKKK YOOOOOUUUUU

the one time I trust you with my back and you plant a dagger in it.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Raya on Tue Apr 29, 2014 1:38 pm

Russians butthurt by Austrian dude who looks like a lady

Admittedly I'm very tempted to change this thread title to 'A Hotbed of Sodomy' now.

Anyway, there's less than 2 weeks to go! Here's my rundown of the acts:

Best Song Of The Whole Show

Latvia. It's upbeat, catchy and will be stuck in your head all day. Judging by the singers/video there are no prizes for guessing what the special ingredient is in that cake. HINT: It's not love.

Honourable mention goes to Hungary. It's a great song, but I suspect it will suffer during the live performance.

Spoiler:






Top of the Pops

Ukraine and Moldova.

My money's on one of these two to win it this year. Ukraine's song is very Eurovision-bait (I'm getting a lot of Satellite vibes), plus they'll be getting a lot of sympathy votes. Moldova's song is pretty dull at first, but gets better and better the longer you listen. Definitely leaning towards Ukraine though.

Spoiler:




Nil Points From Eastern Europe Division

Austria and Iceland. Both are completely self-explanatory.

I think Iceland's might be Sah's theme song.

Spoiler:




Scandalous It Didn't Get Through/Obligatory Song About Pirates

Germany's potential entry Fiddler On The Deck. Instead the German public chose some ballad by a chick that will come squarely in the middle of the rankings. The jerries have no taste. Boooo.

Spoiler:



Ripping Off Other Acts Brigade

Italy are sending the poor man's Lady Gaga whilst France are entering a one-man Jedward. Should someone tell them Jedward didn't actually do well?

Finland have also apparently kidnapped A Friend In London, the Danish entry from 2011, and are hoping that nobody notices.

Spoiler:







Stuck In A Timewarp Award

Belgium's entry would have swept the contest back in the 1970s. Unfortunately it's currently the 21st century. I'd be surprised if it gets through the semi-finals.

Spoiler:



Pandering For Ethnic Votes


Poland and Ireland. Poland's song is absolute garbage, but it's still going to do better than your country because of all the slavs voting for it. Ireland is possibly the only country in the world that makes a shittonne of money out of its stereotypes and milks it as much as it can.

Spoiler:




Actually Pretty Good

Greece, FYR Macedonia and Switzerland have got entries that wouldn't be out of place in the charts. Expect these guys to be dark horses. Then again Switzerland didn't get anywhere last year despite their excellent act, so...

Spoiler:





Forgetting They're In Eurovision Department

The Netherlands. A good song but incredibly out of place. If it gets placed towards the end of the running it will do well, but I suspect it won't. But they sent an unlikely Eurovision act last year and it did well, so who knows.

Also I think Portugal have accidentally sent in the soundtrack for Rainbow Islands rather than their entry...

Spoiler:



A good lot this year, what do you guys think?

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"We'll be going about our business one day and then someone will be like "hm, where's Barda" and Raya will all suspiciously be like "WELL DON'T LOOK AT ME"..." - Rocket Admin Camilla
King Avalanche:
Spoiler:

FUCK YOU RAYA.

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

AND

FUUUUUUCKKKKK YOOOOOUUUUU

the one time I trust you with my back and you plant a dagger in it.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Fedaykin on Thu May 08, 2014 7:08 am

This pretty much sums up everybody's opinion about our entrance:


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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Fri May 09, 2014 12:18 pm

Unfortunately I missed both of the semifinals so far, so I couldn't provide my TRADEMARK running commentary which is widely regarded as an enlightening LONG-RUNNING FORUM CLASSIC.

This will change in the finals tomorrow. I haven't prepared myself for this in any way. I only know who is there for Finland and that according to the media, apparently Poland's entry includes cleavage. Lots of it.
But otherwise I'm going in completely blind.

Tomorrow I will set this thread ON FIRE.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Raya on Fri May 09, 2014 2:43 pm

One year Spont we need to get together, get drunk and do a live running commentary.

The semifinals were great, although there were a lot of shocking choices. Belarus' rubbish Cheesecake song got through as well as the Godawful Polish entry (apparently slavic girls are whores and nobody in Poland uses a washing machine). Azerbaijan's snoozefest somehow qualified but the brilliant Cake To Bake didn't. And I can't believe Ireland didn't qualify. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Maybe next year they can actually come up with a song that isn't celtic knots and shamrocks.

I think Austria has a damn good chance of winning this year. It was the clear favourite of the show and people were giving it a standing ovation. When the results were being announced the crowd was chanting 'AUSTRIA AUSTRIA' and went wild when it got through. The live performance was great, and Conchita Wurst is absolutely fabulous on stage. I think the only thing that's going to challenge it from being a runaway winner is backwater Eastern Europe not being able to handle the idea of a man in a dress.

Also can we please talk about how the first two minutes of this was actually a thing that happened:




'straya

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"Foxes never lose their tricks, do they?" - Quaetman
"We'll be going about our business one day and then someone will be like "hm, where's Barda" and Raya will all suspiciously be like "WELL DON'T LOOK AT ME"..." - Rocket Admin Camilla
King Avalanche:
Spoiler:

FUCK YOU RAYA.

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

AND

FUUUUUUCKKKKK YOOOOOUUUUU

the one time I trust you with my back and you plant a dagger in it.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Relmitos on Fri May 09, 2014 3:06 pm

So how much of the continent is left after the tidal wave that dropping Australia right next to it made hit?

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 10, 2014 1:07 pm

Ladies and gentlemen.

We're going in.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 10, 2014 1:21 pm

Progress so far: Man in a giant hamster wheel, and a group of the most well dressed male strippers I've seen.
EUROVISION.

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

Post  Spontaneous Combustion on Sat May 10, 2014 1:28 pm

ICELAND

WHAT

WHY

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Re: Look down, look back up. This thread is now Eurovision

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